Hong Kong Jerry Will Ride Again

2009-08-22T20:59:00.008-05:00

Dr. Scholls: Friend or Foe?

2009-04-15T13:53:00.008-05:00

I think my take on Dr. Scholl's is probably a bit different than yours. I see a man with a virtual stronghold on the foot comfort market. Yet no one raises their guns to say, "We're putting you on the chopping block Dr. Scholls! Time to pay the fiddler, foot whore!"
No, no one would do that. Too much to lose, not enough to win. I guess foot comfort is a less explored topic in today's fast-paced world of computers and drinkable yogurt. Not enough of us stop to recognize the small monopolies that exist, such as the one Dr. Scholl's has on the foot comfort market. Can you name another foot insert specialist? No. Because there aren't any.
But I do have to give kudos to Dr. Scholls. You make a helluva insert. I'm gellin' right now. But watch your back. Someone's gunning for you.

Man Law: Men Don't Let Other Men Massage Their Feet

2009-04-13T16:39:00.003-05:00

I thought this was obvious. But it came up at rehearsal last night, as it relates to one of the key scenes in the play. I have a feeling the real Hong Kong Jerry would let another man massage his feet. Especially if he read it in Maxim. If it's in Maxim, real Hong Kong Jerry is going to do it.

We're going to have to rule out anything having to do with a trip to the podiatrist. Sometimes you have bone spurs or bunyons and you have to get those taken care of. So, if it's a trip to the podiatrist, it's ok. You haven't broken a man law.

I suppose for myself (and this is strictly on the basis of a hot bikini-lady with cold beer not being available to massage my feet) the only situation I could see myself in would have to involve free beer. If someone was going to give me free beer to let another man massage my feet, that would not constitute the breaking of a man law. The time he spent massaging my feet would be directly related to the amount of free beer that I would be receiving post foot massage.

Now, I would have to question the individual giving me the beer to watch me get my feet massaged. But I supposed that's neither here nor there. So long as he wasn't humping the canned/bottled beer (I don't have a preference what the beer is contained in when it's free) while I'm getting my feet massaged and getting it all warm. That would lower the amount of time my feet would be massaged in relation to the amount of beer I was getting. No one likes warm beer and I would have to waste precious drinking time getting my free beer chilled. That's just aggravating.

Other than that, I don't think it's really acceptable within a real man's world to let another man massage your feet. Just an opinion.

The Countdown Begins

2009-04-07T13:36:00.004-05:00

It's one month to go before opening night and I have a pants-shitting amount of work ahead of me. And I'm not talking a case of the squirts; I'm talking full blown Montezuma's revenge. I carry a second pair of drawers with me wherever I go. Although, I never thought Hong Kong Jerry would come to fruition, so its all good.

We had the first rehearsal last night and I have to say I was a bit timid and realized I need to think through the characters more. Did some brainstorming last night and I think I have a better way of explaining things to Jamie and Alex. And thank god for their improv background! Some of the shit that comes out of their collective mouth is hysterical ("Carmen Elektra is so old she's like the crypt keeper" - genius). It's definitely making the script better.

Let's hope we can blow through some stuff tonight!